The United States of America—home of the free and courageous. The land where baseball, the Reuben sandwich, and Walmart all had their humble beginnings. The United States of America is the kind of place where everyone has an opinion, in part because the nation has been a major player in world affairs for a considerable amount of time and in part because we Americans have a well-earned reputation for being a little bit self-absorbed.
We have compiled a list of humorous memes from around the internet that reflect the good, the terrible, and the ugly sides of life in the United States. And as a citizen of the United States of America, we are here to serve as your tour guide each step of the way as you make your way through the magnificent magnificence, amazing liberty, and complete craziness that is the United States of America.
My Dear My Deer
Realizing who you're advertising to and developing a strategy to capture their attention is crucial to success—and so is crafting a message that resonates with that demographic in particular and makes them want to purchase your goods. With that in mind, the following image is a certain winner in our book.
Even though we don't go out on our own to conduct hunting trips, having a steady supply of high-quality deer carcasses in the freezer does sound like a plus. Most of us would have a hard time imagining what ten cubic feet really looks like, but nonetheless, if you go out on the hunt often, you can probably picture what a deer's corpse looks like in one of these.
Getting What Is Advertised
The following photo is an illustration of bad sign placement or, depending on your point of view, an excellently placed sign. The unintended message is out there—a heart attack or diabetes is right around the corner if you keep eating at McDonald's.
Indeed, we think that statement applies to McDonald's in every possible way. You shouldn't go there if you're concerned about your diet. Two questions: Which of these two signs was put up first? And did the second sign paster appreciate the ridiculousness of this pole?
Confusing Dates
Yet another way in which we depart from the rest of the world is through the calendar. There's no limit to the frustration this one brings people from outside our great nation. In the United States, the month comes first when writing a date, followed by the day, since this corresponds to how the date is often read out loud.
However, in other places of the world, the day comes before the month, as in, 19 October 20. In this case, we don't have strong feelings one way or the other and would gladly cast our ballot for the United States to adopt the other way of reading the time.
Welcome To America
Alright, so the United States of America has a bit of a cluttered skyline. This isn't news to anybody. But we don't think it's a compelling indictment of the United States to take a picture of a rundown section of town next to a highway and then say that this is "what America looks like everywhere."
The United States of America is not like this everywhere. It has a wide amount of variety when it comes to skylines. Most of it is breathtakingly beautiful. We have some lovely big cities and quaint little ones, too. Still, we must own the fact that this type of place exists only in the U.S. of A.
Let’s Be Real
Minimum wage—It may be an emotional and divisive issue, with strong feelings on both sides. U.S. lawmakers have repeatedly blocked efforts to increase the federal minimum wage, which has been stuck at $7.25 for years. It's not easy to make ends meet on the federal minimum wage, as you would imagine. But our beloved employers do love their big piles of money!
One group determined that the minimum wage does not allow for the purchase of a one-bedroom apartment in any state in the United States. Until the US government or Santa Claus comes through, all you can do is try not to settle for a minimum-wage job—even though if nobody took one, the whole country would fall apart.
Important Decisions
Have you ever experienced the strange sensation of laughing and shuddering simultaneously at the same thing? It’s pretty wild that there are reasonable restrictions in place preventing kids from taking up a bad habit or abusing substances, but when it comes to packing a kid up on a bus and sending them into a war zone, it’s all go, hoss!
We aren’t in favor of encouraging young people to start smoking. We’re also not in favor of military recruiters pressuring young people into making a decision they may not fully comprehend. Here’s our solution: move the military and smoking ages up to about 50. Problem solved.
Scary Measures
We do our best to be tolerant and accepting of people from other backgrounds, and we are well aware of the many ways in which the United States falls short of the ideal envisioned by its citizens. Still, whenever we hear someone outside of the United States lamenting that we have not adopted the metric system, we grin a little.
The more people outside of the United States criticize the metric system, the more amusing it is. If you spend time worrying about whether or not the United States will ever adopt a different measuring system, you should probably take up a hobby or something.
Doctor Who?
It is common knowledge that medical treatment in the United States is prohibitively expensive. Without health insurance, which your employer may or may not offer you, you will have difficulty paying for costly medical care without racking up a mountain of mental-health-destroying debt.
Don't get us wrong—it really is a tragic situation. But when we see this picture, we can’t help but smile. The abundance of doctor-themed sodas amazes us—and the fact that they are all obviously parodies of Dr. Pepper makes us laugh out loud.
Speaking Of…
Discovering other cultures is one of our favorite things to do. As such, we now realize how very fortunate we are to be able to speak English as a first language. After all, for many people in the world, English serves as a lingua franca—or common language. People who don't share a common language are more likely to resort to English while trying to communicate with one another.
Since that is the case, the fact that we have forgotten almost everything we learned in our undergraduate German studies is less of a problem. Even though we don’t speak another language, every country in the world has to play second fiddle to us, thanks to the petrodollar. USA! USA!
Sick Of This
Have you ever read or heard something that at first seems uplifting but then, upon reflection, seems outright tragic? That’s what happened to us when we read this CNN tweet. When you really think about it, it’s pretty dystopian.
Initially, you may think it's great that this educator has such a kind group of colleagues. But if you gave it some thought, you'd understand how tragic it was that a public servant who has spent his life serving others doesn't have enough vacation time to cope with a terminal illness.
Waiting Patiently
Here's a helpful tip for interacting with folks who don't speak your language: even if they are visiting a place where English is the official language, you shouldn't insult them for not knowing it. After all, English speakers definitely wouldn't enjoy a trip to the Netherlands if locals chastised them for not knowing the local language.
With this picture, the advice takes on further meaning since the individual being urged to speak English is doing it in the “original” English. Although the Yorkshire accent might be rather weird at times, that doesn't make what they're saying any less English than any other accent.
Perfection
If you've been keeping up with U.S. news in recent years, you're probably aware that the Confederate flag, which represented the South during the American Civil War, is still proudly displayed in some parts of the country. Those who fly the flag are likely to defend it by saying "states' rights," but everyone knows it’s just a way for bad people to signal that they miss the time of slavery.
The meme's creator, however, believes that the Confederate States of America should be primarily recognized for the fact that they accomplished something perhaps more significant than anything else they did during the Civil War—they surrendered without having to pay reparations.
Choosing Weapons
The following graphic contrasts a motorized riding shopping cart with other types of shopping carts, concluding that the final entry has superior strength but is clumsy and slow. But we still believe it would do well against any other cart in a battle.
Sure, agility and speed are admirable qualities, but you know the motorized cart can take a beating and keep on rolling. It won't outsmart the competition, but it will outlive them. We applaud your efforts, woman in the electric cart. You can handle everything that life throws your way.
Choose Wisely
We tell you what, chums, it's been one heck of a long, bizarre voyage over the last three years. Not that it wasn't challenging and unusual in other countries, but here in the good ol' U.S. of A., it’s been lunacy from the get-go. However, maybe that's because we’ve been right in the thick of things.
We have a problem in the United States because some folks have decided that their freedom trumps all other people’s freedoms, including access to good health and protection against an easily avoidable (with a free vaccine) plague. Maybe they were just scared of hospitals because of the (usually) high price of healthcare.
Don’t Get Me Started
To begin with, it's unclear why anybody would assume a white person couldn't communicate in Spanish. Does it imply that white people have difficulty picking up other tongues? Is this person making fun of Americans because they hardly ever leave the country?
Also, how could they have missed the fact that many white folks are fluent in Spanish—being that it’s their first language? The assumption that "White people can't speak Spanish" is, frankly, completely ridiculous.
Puppy Size
We've said it before, and we'll repeat it: we don't understand the fuss that certain countries make about the way Americans measure their goods. If you find yourself having to conduct mental conversions, you can always use the internet. If you are traveling to a nation that uses a currency different from your own, you will need to make some currency conversions anyway.
That being said, a country where everything is measured in dog sizes would be fantastic. Just look at that cute little puppy! Just look at how content he seems to be bogged down in that hole. Happy dogs should be used as standard units of measurement.
Tea Time Problems
We own tea kettles, do we not? At least, we thought we did. Well, we can confirm our sightings of many kettles. But maybe we've been misinformed about what a kettle is. Do nations other than the United States use special kettles that we in our country don't have access to?
We’ll say this—there will always be an audience for Boston Tea Party jokes. The idea that we opted to deal with excessive taxes by tossing a lot of tea in the ocean gives us an odd sense of pride. Take that, British aristocracy!
Clearing Up The Whole Fahrenheit Thing
Disagreement over measurements extends beyond length and mass to include temperature—with the United States being one of just a few nations to use Fahrenheit rather than adopting the more universally accepted Celsius. And yes, we do realize that there are many benefits to using Celsius.
Think of it this way: if we suddenly moved to Fahrenheit, the name of the '90s boy band “98 Degrees” wouldn't make much sense. Twenty-five years ago, 98 Degrees was one of our favorite bands, and we were tremendous admirers of them. That's why we're content to give up our comfort for theirs.
We Can’t Bear To Hear It
Even if your high school English teacher insists otherwise, it's natural and healthy for language to develop and evolve through time. Words evolve to signify different things. It's all in how we decide to put them to use. The manner we say things also changes.
Just look at old documents from history, such as the Bill of Rights of the United States of America. In the 1700s, the term "the right to carry arms" was popular in the parlance, and although it is still understandable now, it is not used as often as it once was.
America In One Picture
Let’s admit the obvious for a second—McDonald's isn't great. A lot of folks we know like it since it's convenient, quick, and cheap, making it an excellent source of salt and preservatives. But it's a total letdown in terms of taste and nutrition. Better fast food options are available.
Mcdonald's may be as American as sliced bread, but it has become a global phenomenon to the point that the Big Mac index is used to gauge the buying value of currencies in other nations. In light of this, the sight of a McDonald's sign next to an American flag, topped with not one but two bald eagles, is enough to make even our hardened hearts ache with a tear of sweet, sweet freedom.
Cease Your Riddles, Hobbit
Here's a little story: the one time we went to the United Kingdom, we rented a car and promptly drove into the wilds of Kent. We were driving down these narrow country roads that were barely wide enough for our car. We weren't used to driving on the left side of the road, so we kept freaking out whenever we passed another vehicle. Eventually, we slammed into the curb, bursting a tire.
For this reason, we can relate to the poster here who found driving in the UK incomprehensible. Why? Because getting gas was a hassle there, too. Whence comes the liter measurement? You're going to get very far if your gas tank is the size of a teapot. When you factor in the high price of gas in much of Europe, Americans are in for a rough time.
We Have The Formula
We don't tune in to many reality competition programs these days. Sob stories about how our next contestant is a single mom who simply loves her kids so much are 70% of the people on Ninja Warrior, which we cannot watch even though we love obstacle course shows.
In this regard, America's Got Talent is among the biggest offenders. Perhaps we're coldhearted, but We'd rather hear about the talent on display than how Steve is competing in memory of his late pet rock. We're only here to listen to you sing, Steve.
This Is Getting To Be A Bigger Problem
Here's another wonderful example of using animals as measuring devices: although a blue whale isn't quite as attractive as a dog, its size makes it a much more efficient alternative than, say, hundreds of dogs when calculating the dimensions of a basketball court.
More than anything else, we find this picture fascinating since it defies all logic and reason. We've always been aware that whales are big, but we're not sure we ever really appreciated how big they are. It's incredible that one animal can span a whole basketball court. Also, we really want to see a game of basketball played atop a blue whale.
Working Poor, Or Poorly Working?
Most folks these days can’t even survive on the income of one job due to the rising costs of living. Even while Uber Eats advertises itself as a flexible, high-paying employer—sorry—client, the people driving those cars barely make enough to afford their antidepressants.
It would be nice if people were paid fairly for their contributions to society. It’s especially aggravating when you remember that when people have disposable income, they tend to spend it—which means the companies trying to block fairer wages would probably make more money if they paid their employees properly. Oopsie!
Gotta Catch Them All
Remember Pokemon Go? Remember how everyone—even those who had never played a Pokemon game before—flocked outdoors to capture an Eevee, or a Magicarp, when crowds of people would gather around libraries, trampling lawns and littering the streets? Those were the days.
Even though we're making fun, we think it was a great initiative that encouraged so many folks to exercise. However, "go outdoors" isn't always the best suggestion, especially when a tornado is hitting your town. Pretend shots had been fired. Imagine if both had taken place simultaneously. In such a situation, it's best to remain inside.
God, Give Us Patience
For those of you who are too weak-hearted to stare upon the avatar of freedom itself—cover your eyes. We've been looking at this for a long, long time, and we still don't know what we love more—the giant firework or the fact that its clothing has an uncharacteristically Egyptian feel to it, despite the enormous American flag.
However, the actual explanation lies in the creepiness of a highly muscular guy with a bald eagle head. Incorporating human hands into the anatomy of a bald eagle is weird. There should be no visible veins on their biceps. We can’t help but wonder how many PATRIOTS have used this as their profile picture since America’s inception. Probably billions.
An English Lesson
Here, we have an odd and angry post in which the poster purports to care so much about grammar but isn't very well-versed in the rules as they should be. To be honest, we’re language descriptivists who believe that languages evolve with the humans who use them.
Some people have trouble with using “they” as a singular pronoun. It’s very helpful when you don't know the gender of the person you're discussing. Some folks in the non-binary community have opted to use it as their personal pronoun, which some people struggle to get their heads around. It’s easy once you get the hang of it.
Maybe Think Twice
We aren’t personally gun fanatics—we believe guns are unsafe and that the only time you truly need one is when you are out hunting or if your line of work requires you to kill people. Equally, as people who do not partake in alcohol all too often, we find hard drinks to be both harmful and conducive to foolish behavior. Put both of these things together? Well…
These two gentlemen are apparently comfortable enough in each other's company that they like to shoot each other in the chest. Well, at least they were wearing body armor—but that wouldn’t have mattered if one of them aimed a little too high. Those who drink together shouldn’t shoot each other—period.
Frustrating, We Know
We'll be honest with you—we can't make sense of what's happening here. Do most troopers have occasional bouts of annoyance like this? Would this photo make more sense if we could see the remainder of the sign? Probably.
Sometimes, when a colleague says something that truly gets under our skin in the office, we wish we had a designated "frustration area" to vent our anger. Like when someone drives in the fast lane ten miles per hour below the posted speed limit while we're on the interstate. Just picture yourself settling into the pout zone and letting out a satisfying sigh.
Mexican Made American Crayons
We know the appeal of decorating goods with the American flag all too well. You can get American flag-themed cooking aprons, hand soap, motorbikes, tattoos, shoes, and just about everything else you can think of in the world.
But we don't see why anybody would want one on crayons—and the fact that there are four of them in a box baffles us even more. Besides that, it’s hilarious that these “patriotic” crayons were produced across the border, presumably so that the owners could save a few bucks by using cheap labor instead of American labor. That’s the American way!
Keep It Cool
There has been a lot of miscommunication throughout the years due to the difference between Fahrenheit and Celsius. The actual temperature of an event may change the whole tone of a story. For example, a story about a girl stranded in -8 degree temperatures in Fahrenheit vs. Celsius will be very different.
So, now we see what this picture is trying to convey. This is coming from people who experience extreme temperatures throughout the year—thirty degrees Celsius (or fifty degrees Fahrenheit) is nothing to worry about. Temperatures in the Celsius range make us think we should turn on the air conditioner. Throw on a light jacket if the temperature is in the Fahrenheit range.
American Health Care
Due to the lack of a nationalized or socialized healthcare system in the United States, citizens must find ways of financing their own medical treatment, even if they are insured. Let’s face it—the medical treatment expenditures in this country are pretty high. Therefore, even a single trip to the hospital might significantly impact your budget.
Forget the humor for a second and allow us to be financial nerds—obtain health insurance if at all possible! In addition, set aside money in case of unexpected expenses. Be ready for any future medical crises if you can.
I Don’t Believe That Tastes Good
It's safe to assume that the person in question deserved what was coming to them. Andrew Myrick is a name we're not familiar with, but his suggestion that hungry Native Americans “eat grass” has a lot of "Let them eat cake" energy—and we all know what happened to Marie Antoinette.
It's very disrespectful and stupid to say that to hungry people, particularly to people who have been treated as poorly as Native Americans in the United States. Can you blame some of them if they use the opportunity to exact poetic justice?
That’s A Lot Of Pizza
Pizza is one of our nation's favorite foods. We've taken a simple Italian meal and turned it into something even a native Italian wouldn't recognize. Then we discovered a million bizarre ways to play with that food—pizza rolls, filled crust pizza, pizza bagels, and pizza everything.
Pizza ticks all the boxes for an ideal meal: it's filling, delicious, portable, and can be eaten with your hands. This kind of treat is ideal since it provides pleasure without breaking the bank. The amount of pizza consumed in the United States annually can be measured in acres. Knowing that our fellow citizens share our enthusiasm for the world's finest cuisine makes us glad to be Americans.
Get Off Our Property!
Let us fill you in if you haven’t yet been acquainted with Texans. Generally speaking, Texans are quite kind people. Some of them are the nicest we've ever encountered. Nonetheless, there is a propensity among certain members of the population to be, shall we say, unusual.
The state of Texas is the origin of our fixation with the idea that bigger is better. They are quick to point out that Texas was once its own republic before it became a part of the United States. You’d be right to assume that many Texans have firearms and that a sizable portion of them are ready and eager to use them if the opportunity presents itself.
You Guessed Right, Doc
When we were kids, one of our chores was to mow the lawn. Even though we were compensated for our efforts, we detested mowing the grass. As we've become older, we discovered that spending even half an hour on newly cut grass makes us a wheezy, teary mess.
Perhaps this person shared our hatred of the lawn and decided to go to war with the concept of grass—literally. It wouldn’t be the first time we’ve gone to war against an abstract concept. We’re not sure how turning your mower into a tank will help mow more effectively, but maybe it can protect you against hay fever.
Strong Words For Disneyland
One of the things you'll discover about Americans if you stay here for any length of time is that some of them will take oddly aggressive stances on almost every issue. Typically, these people have at least one firearm in their possession and a bumper sticker proclaiming their willingness to risk death in the name of freedom.
Are these folks really in the armed forces? Who knows. However, one thing is certain: they will not face any life-threatening threats when visiting Disneyland. So, it seems excessive to wear such an aggressive sweater to the happiest place on earth.
Our Favorite Aisles
There's no way this isn't the work of Photoshop—no one would ever put pizza next to clothes and weapons (pizza has to be kept hot or cold, depending on whether you've cooked it yet). Our sharp eyes picked up on certain words being blurry in several places.
We'll be the first to acknowledge that if you were to design an American-themed grocery store aisle, this is one way to organize your products—save for the potatoes, of course. Do we take potatoes for granted as an American staple? If that's the case, we take our place among the greatest Americans in history; we're huge potato fans.
Improvised X-ray Machine
There are many times when we find ourselves wishing we were Europeans. They have beautiful art, sublime food, convenient transportation (while we’re stuck in car hell), and very well-designed cities (that weren’t half-destroyed to make way for a million parking lots).
And when we consider how much we have to pay for medical treatment in the United States compared to other countries, we start to wish we didn't have to pay anything at all. Imagine if the government covered the cost of your X-rays. Instead, we have to sneak our broken limbs into our vet’s x-ray machine—or go to someone like this guy.
Tailgating
You know you are in the southern side of America when you see a bunch of trucks on the highway. There is nothing that screams patriotism more than a good old tailgate party. Here is an example of a proud American that is unapologetic when it comes to his vehicle of choice.
Here’s an example of a great American tradition. We just love trucks in this country—and if there’s any way we can fit more trucks into our lives, we’ll do it. One reason why people love trucks so much here is that we also love camping out in the wild—so it figures that good ol’ trucks are popular.